Stress-Induced Myopia

I’m a big picture kind of person, typically speaking. That being said, with stressful life circumstances, I can get a little short-sighted. I need someone to come in with a fresh set of eyes, sometimes literally, in my situation and tell me where I’m failing or succeeding or even what in tarnation I’m doing.

Really, you know the phrase about not seeing the forest for the trees? When I’m stressed, I vacillate between, “There are no trees. The trees have all died” and “I’m sure the trees are around here somewhere. They’re supposed to be really beautiful, and I wish I could see them.” Insert Drama Here.

Heather note: when I wrote this, I genuinely thought that all of the 60s and 70’s musical references were cute and clever. I’m not so sure anymore, but I couldn’t think of new subheadings.  You’re welcome for the sneak preview of my scattered brain. 

Color My World

Last week, I was growing frustrated with a crocheting project. Colors just weren’t working together like I had imagined they would. So I asked Michael to look through my crochet boards on pinterest (yes, I’ve got multiple ones….shameless.) Were there any common color schemes? I could see the patterns and types of crochet stitches that I frequently enjoy or find beautiful, but the color schemes were difficult. Michael managed to put together a computer application to analyze color schemes for me. Husband Of The Year. And it appears that I like plum and fuschia a lot more than I thought I did, which is causing a mid-life crisis.

Our House Is a Very Fine House

In the same way, I’ve felt frustrated and disjointed as I prepare for this move. It seems that each move our houses have gotten less beautiful and “home-like.” With our first home, I devoted a lot of time to decorating and choosing colors and paint. With our second home, I didn’t really paint and barely hung artwork. With this home, it’s always been temporary. It’s not been a home. Or beautiful. I really want to fight against that with our future home, wherever that may be, in France. I want it to be a place of beauty and goodness.

So again, I went to my boards on Pinterest. I was able to see common themes for myself this time. (Michael breathes a sigh of relief. He dodged a bullet, there, right?) I saw that I love white, wicker, wood, open shelving in the kitchen, wood floors, comfortable linens, and a few other things. A lot of the things I enjoy I won’t have control over. We have no idea where we’re living, let alone what the “bones” of our future home look like. But I can take the ideas I’ve compiled and bring the ones that I can control into fruition.

Teach Your Children Well

Lastly, I’ve been working on organizing all of our homeschool ideas and thoughts for Michael, as he may have to teach some of the time while I’m in language school. Until two weeks ago, homeschool had gotten in a bit of a ho-hum routine. But I was able to find the big picture and remind myself once again of why we’re doing what we’re doing, and why we’ve chosen the subjects to study that we’ve chosen.

These Eyes

It’s not often that I find a theme repeated so blatantly throughout so many aspects of my life. I wanted to take the time to write this down as a lesson for myself. It’s given me cause to think about whether or not I’ve become myopic (near-sighted) in my relationships with my family members and with God as well. (Pinterest boards won’t help me there.) I love that the Bible talks about “fixing our eyes” and “setting our gaze” and “looking” so many times. It’s been a helpful reminder when I want to look anxiously about me.

‘Do not fear, for I am with you; Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, Surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.’ Isaiah 41:10

He’s the one that I should be looking at in these times of stress.